halves (stream of consciousness)

a half of you
sings 
to a half of me

a life
that was new
is whole again

and if 
i lost 
the feeling of your song

i wouldn't last long
i wouldn't last long
i wouldn't last long

but what's left
would be a beautiful echo

of you

(true)

can't win

when life is too far
then feelings get close

when it's all not fair
then there's nothing to know

you can stare me down
in an instant
change the temperature
in a moment
live forever and take
my breath
make a smile and
step on my neck

keep it going
as if no one else can see
what misery you've given me

over and over and over and over again

can't win

(sin)

no pause

totally behind
on everything

trying to be all
to everyone

waiting for the pause
that's not going to come

perhaps never again

people calling 
from left and right

people expecting
with all their might

waiting for the breath
that never exhales

slowly being buried
in all this email

nothing more to see

just the misery of me

(close)

 

linger

when i was trying
to be mindful with your time

and saying goodbye
yet again

i felt your voice linger

when we hang out 
at the doorway we
lean on the frame
and stare eye to eye

being exclusive

but when we talk
on the airways we
lean on the phone
and listen ear to ear

getting as close as
we can be

through the technology

i never know
when you want to stay
or go

all i know
is that it's forever too soon

will the moon break
when we merge to-gether
again

who knows?

linger closer, maybe we'll see

(be)

hid

within the heart
of what everyone saw

was the child 
she could have been

if only they let her be
who she wanted to be

(hid)

why do at all

so many of my disappointments

are wrapped around the souls of

others

right now

the pressure of the expectations

of one

grind me to the ground

and the dissatisfaction of another

darkens the sky even further

and the distance of one

so caring

with fair eyes and entrancing

stares

is almost not at all there

because of what i can't see

because what i'll never be

i will disappoint 

no matter what 

i do

so why do at all?

(fall)

silence

you give me silent vibes
and i don't know what
to say

you stare at me
with your piercing eyes
compelling me
to ask you
what you want

but you don't speak
with your words

you sigh
you cower
you shadow
you stomp

you fling your hair
away from me

but you don't say
a word

i know
i know
i know

but i don't know

(mute)