the rain

the rain 

trickles down

the window pane

mimicking the tears

that appear in 

my eyes

if i let it

it will rule over

my heart

making it stop

all feeling 

inside

blocking the sun

and everyone who

wants to help

i sit on my shelf

hypnotized

barely alive

(dry)

wise

1)

one potion, three cups
which one has the best of it
which one has the worst?

2)

i used to wonder
what would make me the wisest
now i just want heart

3)

eyes of wisdom stare
cups leading to who knows where
take another drink

in conference

you and me
bouncing ideas

from head to head

whisper low
so i can hear

what i should have said

you and me
against the world

conference to conference

even when
all their thoughts

make no sense
make no sense

tell me again
what to say

i'll learn to mean it

(repeat)

accept

as the night
grew still
and the dreamy voices
set in

and i could feel him
slowly slip away

he willed himself
to clarity
to tell me
most tenderly

about my creativity

he told me
he liked to see
my pictures

(not the selfies)

he liked
what my eye saw
and what my photos
told

in mid-darkness

i knew
there was truth
in his whispers

because the last thing
you say
before you turn out
your light

is the thought
that separates you
from your convictions

and even obstetricians
long for
the sleep of a child

meek and mild
and accepting
of all things good

(could)

arbor life

1)

once i roamed freely
then the tree took over me
now i'm arbor life

2)

climbing to the sun
spreading arms and legs and stuff
straining for a rhyme

3)

i was once like you
but i stopped to think it through
now it's all through me

please

we once breathed

the same air

your dark hair

fluttering in the breeze

you tried so hard

to keep me sane

you tried so hard to please

i saw red 

that fateful night

at the damnable sight

of you in that dress

you tried too hard

to keep me looking

you tried too hard to please

coping

i kiss the sun
when you're not here
it's almost as hot
and twice as near

(find)

binding

1)

be careful what's held
a kingdom slides through fingers
if you look away

2)

i once had the world
by the short and curly ones
nothing ever lasts

3)

he held her whole world
trapping her with his strong grasp
binding with his love

observations

my dearest friend
my friend and i

would always peek
out the window
at any occurance

the hispanic couple
next door
wailing at each other
as their music blared
something about
hearts and
fajitas

the older man
across the way
who waved
at every car
but screamed
at the sky
whenever he was
too full of falstaff

the kids
around the corner
who punched each other
on the shoulder
but then linked arms
whenever the local bully
walked by

my friend
would never say
anything
but his eyes
would drink in
everything

leaving me
to fill in the blanks
with love and care

and adjectives
your local mad libs
wouldn't allow

(how)

floating dreams

he got her
a painting
with a mermaid

floating
in
the
ever
blueness

and she hung it
on her bookcase
near the window

with duct tape
and spit

one day
in the drama
of what she was

she threw a pillow
into the air

(or was it a stuffed 
animal?)

it flipped
her siren of the sea
off her
lowe's discount perch

and splashed
into
the
endless
clutter

of everything that made
marie kondo cry

now she swims
in the memory

of surprises and
birthdays and
unspeakable love

waiting for
the day she's
discovered in the
dust

conversing with
keats and keene
and bukowski
until then

(swim)

the grey days

i can see
the grey days
coming

happenings aren't
as joyful
as they usually are

i can't taste food
i can't breathe deeply

i can't hear certain songs
without tearing up

i hide from people
who truly want to know
how i feel

i either want to
walk and walk and walk
away into the darkness

or hide and cower and
crumple my heart
into a little ball

away from civilized people

i can see
the grey days
coming

but for once i'm ready
for them

you won't hear me
moan
or see me
flinch

this time

grey is the new
black
for me

this time

(gone)

flying

1)

to oz, you say now
as we fly in spinning house
to another world

2)

i wondered so hard
that my roots let go of me
pushing clouds away

3)

did you ever see
nothing but sepia
yet dream it all in colour?

free

she played the piano
and as she pressed
each key

she leaned down
and listened to
what resonated
underneath

and when the
tone of the music
matched
the groan in
her heart

then
and only then
was she satisfied

for to let out
what's inside
with whatever
you can put a hand to

is releasing
the pain
the sadness
the gladness
the badness

away from 
your tender self

and out into
the world

hopefully
to have it
dissipate
and disappear

into the air

to let you live again

(free)