instruction book

touch my face

randomly

hold my hair

tenderly

in odd moments,

drape your arm

around my hips

lean on my shoulder

from behind

unexpectedly

do all

without provocation

or denigration

without wanting

everything

or needing me to do

anything

but look and

feel you

revel and 

lean against you

need and be needed

from afar

even the stars 

would be jealous

of what we are

if you follow things

to the letter

(do)

enigma

again the wrong
comes out my mouth

again the song
ends

again the time
cuts short the reverie

again the remark
stops the good memory

can nothing stay
in colour

must it all be black and
white

always fight
with myself
or fight
against help

i dream
but don't remember

what i savor
is what's left behind

(mind)

silently

so many times
i have to
suffer

quietly

and tell no one
how i truly feel

that's not unusual

everyone hides
something

whether it be
how they feel
about someone

how they feel
around someone

or how they feel
under someone

my grammar
may be crude
and my manner
may be rude

but i won't tell
how i truly feel

even with you

not that you'd notice
my truth
anyway

we all 
have veils

(trail)

advice

"don't ever fall
for a poet"

the wise one
said to me

"for all she'll do
is scrutinize

and drive you
crazily"


"she'll give you
words like 'poetical'

and hide her
dictionary

she'll ask you
questions like 'dat u?'

and want to hear
soliloquies"


"no don't ever fall
for a poet

for what a falling off
is there"

he said no more
but his eyes

glazed over in
a stare

that said volumes

if only i'd listened

(ere)

spammed poetically

greetings!!

do you want to make your time
a bit more inspiring

and exceptional?

i'd like to find a partner
for some sparkling nightimes

of disorder

i dream of being
entwined
in one thing whole

as two passionate worms

if wise be your vision
and silk be your voice

and your life tracings
long and steady

i could be ready
to change it all

dramatically

along the banks
of don't-know-where
and under the trees
of did-you-care

i'll be there

find me

(soon)

time limit

i have thirty minutes
to tell you
how much i miss you

before you lose patience
with me

i have thirty minutes
to tell you
how special you are

before you toss the phone
into the air

scream that silent scream
that i always hear with
my heart

and come back again
with that sickeningly sweet
voice

polite in phone language
but
devoid of feeling

tracing down
the middle of the road

to the darkness
i find you in
my dreams

thirty minutes
isn't enough
to remember

what you are to me

but then
how much time
does it take

to trace the rest
of your insanity?

(time)

just another rain

i used to think
all i needed

was a tent
the rain

and you

but now i don't want
to impose my sadness
upon you

all the stops and starts
that happen in conversation

one moment sun,
one moment intense despair

the other doritos

i know
i can fake-smile through
all that surrounds

but you've found
that can't be the truth

for you

and all that's left
could be stuffed into the corner
of a tiny zipper bag
in a mangled backpack

well traveled
never coming back
to what it was

or what could 
have been

(send)

siren no more

i get the fish
for you and i

and we eat
side by side

at night you purr
and the sound
calms me

it supersedes the roar
of the waves

which endlessly cry
and always plagues

it makes me think
no one is near

and i fear whatever
calls me to sing

will start again
the moment you stop
purring

so i get the fish
for you and i

and dine in peace
both day and nigh

so glad to my heart
i am
for thee

(free)

poetic difficulties

erase

and walk

write

and stand still

try to form 

the words that 

make something

out of nothing

the last time

i saw you

it was through a curtain

of tears

an out of focus view

of what you were

ages ago

each time i start

and stop this

i think of something

new to lament

best stop here

(go)

trio of bears

1
you once known as bear
has become a force to me
that strengthens my heart

2
did you ever see
or did you sit in the dark
waiting for a sound?

3
i don't realize
how painful the waiting is
'til i see your face

nothing

he's not going to tell you
what you want to hear

that your eyes
are a chocolate river
that flows sweetness
to his heart

that your hair
is a growing madness
that his fingers
can't help but touch

that your face
defied any darkness
in its sunny disposition

that your song
is the only harmony
that calms his indecision

no, he's not going to tell you
what you want to hear

but when you fear
he'll be there

not saying anything
but calmly waiting
by

(sigh)

sad songs

she played
the sad songs
over and over again

cluing me in
on the rain clouds
within

deep inside her heart

she seldom spoke
when she played the
mellow keys

but often sang
when the memories
overtook her

you never heard
such a rousting version
of walk forward
eileen

or the polka version
of tread softly on
sunshine

the lines form gently
upon her face

tracing each pain

but she still sounds the same

even if all
the songs are sad

(had)