Saturday, September 30, 2017

glares and giggles

the memory
of you
is a fog of words
and gestures

that sit and fester

and pester me
while i work

the spirit
of you
is a blur of war
and wiggles

a mess of
glares and giggles

all intermingling
in a cloud of haze

that i remember
in these dead days

just before winter


Wednesday, September 27, 2017


don't try
so hard
just let it out

don't be
so profound
just make it shout

don't look
at me
for any advice

just write
it down
don't think twice

and open
your mind's inner door

until you 
can't write anymore


painting: The Passion of Creation
by Leonid Pasternak  

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

can't explain, won't

i can't 
look at you
with any sort of fondness

i can't 
believe in you
with any bit of conviction

please don't
ask me
over and over
why it has to happen

please don't
hurt me
over and over
why is it hard to understand?

i'm tired 
of not knowing
where i stand 
in your world

i'm tired
of not saying
what i mean
to your face

i'm tired
of always lying
when was i ever
going to breathe free?

take two
small steps
backward from me

turn around 
and walk away

you're not 
getting any more

you're not 
getting any more

you're getting
a silent
from my lips

and a cool breeze
to carry you 
on your way


Sunday, September 24, 2017


all i want
is to be taken out
of the equation

nothing's ever been

nothing's ever been
good enough

nothing's ever been

all i want
is to be erased
from the sentence

nothing's ever been

nothing's ever been
strong enough

nothing's ever been

with all the real
i thought i was

the steps i walked
will fill in again



Saturday, September 23, 2017


i don't want to
hear you out

you never heard me

i don't want to
let you talk

you never listened to me

i don't want your poison
to entwine in the heart of me

to stop and let go of me

to slowly get rid of me
until there's nothing left

except for your pride

and what's left
of my soul

too bold?
then stop


Friday, September 15, 2017

secret drawing

i saw your secret 

of a darkness
you never show

i read the words
and kept the image

deep within my mind

and even though
i can't say to you

what i know i saw

i will keep reaching out
to you 

in hand and dwelling
in words and spelling
in hope and dispelling

telling you over
and over again

that you are good

did you get the darkness
from me?

how can it be?

i always thought
i kept it secret

from you


Friday, September 8, 2017


you want
too many words
from me

you think
i can talk
the same language
as you

you romanticize
everything i say

even if it's just
"hello, sweatheart!"

or "i picked up
some chips from
the store.. want one?"

or "do you want this
shirt, because if you don't,
i'm going to throw it away

it may or may not
be your favourite

it may or may not be
really soft

because i know you
like soft things

(as if anyone really
talks like this

to anyone else

but you)



never gonna get
what i want from you

never gonna get
what i am to you

all i get
are words
about you

all about you
and not me

never gonna try
to understand you

never gonna try
to demand from you

anything that
my heart wants
from you

never gonna get it

don't stay
just go


Wednesday, September 6, 2017

reasons to stay

you stomp
too loud

and you toss your hair
too much

and the clothes
that wear you
wear me out

but i try
to understand
and i live with
what you are

i don't know why

but there's excitement
where you are

and i want to live it

before the sun
goes down


Monday, September 4, 2017

no more sorrow

let the familiar songs
fill the room

she's sad again

let the bygone tunes
cover all the pain

it's a long night ahead
and no one wants to think
about to-morrow

no more sorrow
no more sorrow

the smallest thing

it's funny how
the smallest thing
that's said

changes all
you see and
do and feel
about someone

no matter how
he says you are

no matter how
you think you are

no matter how much
you want to ignore
the instinct

to let it all go

you know
what to do

even in
your darkest pain

walk away
and grow

or stay
in the darkness
of what was

and never will be


Friday, September 1, 2017

night whispers

you worshipped me
with every word

traced my soul
with every fingertip
on my back

breathed in
my spirit
as you nuzzled
my neck

and whispered
over and over

how much
you loved me

how soon
i'd leave you

how long
you'd keep me

in your memory

and darkness
would drift
in between the
cracks in your


will the night
ever be
so calm again?