real

there was an insistent
barking dog next door

who let her presence be known
over and over again

i tried to tame her 
with dog biscuits
water
kind words

perhaps love

but every time
the shadow of my hand
would come into her sight

she'd bark and bark
trembling furiously
at my audacity

for a day and a day i didn't hear
from her and i worried and 
fretted over what her owners
had done to her

but she soon returned
with a jaunty new sweater
a longer leash

and a look of blood in her eyes

i looked from afar
in gratitude
wondering why i missed
her ferocity

was i always the shadowy helper?

no answer came 
to my question of doubt

but her pout 
no longer intrigued me

the need to be me 
was stronger than 
the uncertainty

of the crumbs she let free

(be)

change

the wind blows
so hard to-night

i can feel it strip the trees
of the leaves
that were once so colourful

just a day ago

and the air
is so cold
so different than it was

just a week ago

they try and tell me
change is good

that the pruning
and the temperature
helps one grow
and mature

but wasn't it
awhile ago
that everything was fine?

time plods on
minute by minute
but all at once

skips a century

before i even got
a chance to see

what i was all about

(fade)

pen

i think of you
in fall

even if you don't think of me
at all

you always wrote better
lived happier
grew stronger

loved deeper
than me

over and over again
i saw the spirit of creativity
take over you

and magic would fly
from your eyes
your fingertips
your feet

your very soul

i think of you 
in fall

hair blowing 
in the wind

gracefully like
the ocean

i don't know how much
you mean to me

but i often stared
and tried to learn

(turn)

remind me

i ask you 
every night
what you do 
without me

and as you tell me
what you think
are the boring details

i picture you
working 
walking
writing

planning out your 
next move

and the next

the imaginations
makes this damn distance
shorter

this dark night brighter

and this dull hope
vibrant
in what could be

once this sickness
is through

and life begins again

so babble on, sweet one
in short words and long

don't worry about making
things fancy

just remind me of the you
you cover inside

surround me with what
makes you free

(be)

distraction

sometimes
you give me
too much hope

and blended 
conversations
become idealized
dreams

where we walk 
hand in hand within
the same mind

blissfully unaware
of the differences
inside

tamping down
thoughts of 
"why must i...."

averting our eyes
from the inevitable 
fall

(stall)

quizzes

when you don't know
how to answer

sometimes that's the answer

when you can't tell 
what to say

sometimes that's the way

when you can't respond
in the normal

maybe the question's abnormal

when you don't know 
how to be

fly free

who knows where you'll land

(hand)

filling in the blanks

i don't think you love me

i think you love the me
that you fill in the blanks with
when i'm not there

reality me is too much
for too little
and too loud
for too soft

and so far away
from what you think
i am

be what i am
and see what you're 
really missing

when you miss 
the dark
of me

(free)